


Am I good enough?

by B3G_CRY



Category: Boyfriend to Death (Visual Novels)
Genre: How Do I Tag, M/M, Memories, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Otherkin, Self-Doubt, fictionkin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-29 03:41:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16736424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/B3G_CRY/pseuds/B3G_CRY
Summary: This'll just be a bunch of memories from an idiot who is kin with strade





	Am I good enough?

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I've ever written down a memory longer than a few sentences. And I haven't written since highschool, so I'm sorry if it's bad. I'm just some strade kin dude who needs to chill.

The sky was a deep navy, sprinkled with bright white stars. Rire and I had been laying on the roof, watching the stars for the past few hours. He had always been distant in our relationship, and it had always bothered me. But I tried to hide it with my feigned happiness. I tried to act like everything was alright as he grew more distant every day. I had been thinking about why he would be so distant when he scooted slightly farther away from me.  
I began to cry silent tears, hoping he wouldn't notice. The tears streamed down my face as I turned over onto my side, back to him. I didn't want to bother him, I didn't want him worrying about me. I wasn't worth that much. So I would cry silently, just hoping I could stop soon enough. He must have heard my sobs or seen me rocking back and forth slightly because he scooted up behind me and wrapped an arm around my body.  
  
“Strade? Is something wrong? Why are you crying?” He asked, sounding worried  
“It's nothing.” I muttered, looking down at the roof.  
“Strade, you wouldn't be crying for no reason. Please tell me what's wrong?”  
“I just… you've been so distant lately. I know it's my fault. I'm not nearly good enough for you, and you deserve someone better. But it still hurts. So much. I love you so much, and if you want, you can leave. I know I can't give you everything you want..” I said through the tears, I just wanted him to admit I was an idiot to think he could love me and just get over with it.  
  
But he didn't, he was silent for what felt like hours but was probably only a minute or two.  
Eventually he sighed  
  
"It's not that you're not good enough. It's that you're too good for me. I'm a demon, I'm going to live so much longer than you. I don't want to get attached, even though I want to hold you closer than anything. I love you and it hurts me to know one day, you're going to die. I didn't want to get attached so that I wouldn't be deviated when you inevitably died.”  
“Why do you stay if you don't want to get attached? Please, if it'll make it easier, please just leave.” I muttered, turning over to look him in the eyes.  
“There's the thing. I don't want to go. I want to hold you forever. I want to make you mine, but if I do, if have to acknowledge I failed at the one thing I was trying to do.”  
  
I scooted closer to him and wrapped my arms around him.  
  
"Until you're ready to admit that, can you just hold me?” I asked. He nodded, picking me up and carrying me to the bedroom. Once we were laying in bed, he wrapped his arms around me. After a while, I began to fall asleep in his arms  
“I do love you.” He said, kissing my forehead “And I'm sorry you've fallen for such an idiot.”


End file.
